Jewish Jokes » Archive
Food For Thought
1.
I know a man so frum, he has two satellite dishes.
2.
A man dies and goes to heaven. There he finds an endless array of appealing foods. And at the dais he sees Hashem Himself! So he goes to Hashem and asks: “Tell me. Who’s your mashgiach?” Hashem answers, “Moshe Rabbenu.” The man thinks for moment, and then says, “I’ll have the fruit plate.”
3.
A blind man is sitting on …
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Filed under: Holidays, Kosher Food, Passover, Traditions
Fatherhood
An old Jewish man gets on the subway in New York and sees a priest. He notices the white collar, and decides to ask what it’s about:
“Why do you wear your collar backwards?” The old Jewish man asks.
The Priest, being polite, responds, “Well, Sir, because I’m a father.”
“I am a father too, but I wear my collar normal.”
…
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Filed under: Jewish Blue-ish, Non-Jewish
An Amazing Man
A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing. You’re just like Moishe.”
Passenger: “Who?”
Cabbie: “A guy who did everything right, like my coming along for you just when you needed a cab. It would have happened like that with Moishe every single time.”
Passenger: “There are always a few clouds over everybody.”
Cabbie: “Not Moishe. He was a terrific athlete. …
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Filed under: Family Life, Marriage