Jokes Comments

* * * * ½ 2 votes

The emperor is auditioning for a new bodyguard.  The first applicant enters, a giant swordsman with a frightening countenance.  He releases an eagle that immediately whooshes around the room at high speed.  The man draws his sword, swings three times in the air, and a dead eagle plummets to the floor in four pieces.

“That’s amazing!” exclaims the emperor.  “You shall be my bodyguard; but first, to be fair, I must audition the two other applicants.”

The second prospect enters.  His footfalls sound like thunder; his fierce face is covered with red paint; he has muscles on his muscles.  He releases a tiny hummingbird.  The bird is too fast to see, but its wings can be heard buzzing in one corner and an instant later in another.  The man dons a blindfold, plucks a dagger from the bloody dragon’s head dangling from his ammunition belt, and suddenly flings it toward toward the ceiling.

The buzzing stops.  The dagger is stuck in the ceiling, but a hummingbird carcass plops on the floor.

“That’s unbelievable!” exclaims the Emperor.  “YOU shall be my new bodyguard.  However, to be polite, there is one more applicant waiting who must be seen.”

A tiny Jewish old man limps into the room.  Struggling to unscrew a glass jar, he releases a gray mosquito that hovers about their heads, annoying the emperor and his entourage.  Calmly, the old man slips a small penknife from his pocket, unfolds it, and waves it above their heads where the the bug is.

The mosquito drops almost to the floor, but then, after some jerky fluttering, regains altitude and soars happily above them.

The emperor is outraged. “What is the meaning of this?  You shall pay for making a mockery of us!  A penknife indeed!  Why, that mosquito ISN’T EVEN DEAD!!!”

“Oh no, Your Majesty!” explains the little old man, “Circumcision isn’t meant to kill.”

Filed under:   Circumcision

Leave a Reply



Highest Rated Jokes This Month

    Highest Rated Jokes of All Time

    These Jokes Need Some Votes